The other day, I was thinking to myself: it’s always important to know what motivates other people. Sometimes people are motivated by appearance: the appearance of success, the appearance of happiness, the appearance of wealth. And that, in turn, reveals a deeper motivation – maybe for validation or admiration, maybe for likes or for envy … More Finding the Why
In June, le beau gifted me the Fujifilm X-E3. Long story short, I discovered a Fujifilm-dedicated blog, scampered down the rabbit hole, and decided the camera was everything I’d ever dreamed of. Next thing you know, le beau’s ordered it! 🥺 I ended up getting the pancake lens shortly afterwards. Like bad CPR, Fujifilm has … More Hot Summer Nights, Mid-July
Over the years, on Wordpress, people have come and gone, shared lives and left, left old blogs to pursue new ones. They continue on with their lives, maybe updating with the occasional life update, but most often not. … More You’ve Got a Blogger in Me
Dreams are interesting. And strange. A few nights ago, I dreamt of someone whom I haven’t spoken to in nearly 10 years. The dream was vivid. We were on the phone. I haven’t thought of this person in a while. We were mostly Internet friends who Facebook chatted aggressively in 2012 while ignoring each other … More Dreaming Reality
I photographed strangers, artwork, puppies, toys, store fronts, adults on small trains, humans wearing felt panda heads. It was then that I realized: there is so much whimsicalness in the world. So much strangeness and beauty. I began to shift my perception, seeing my surroundings in blacks and whites, hues and gradients, shadows and bright spots. … More B&W Film
are like venn diagrams sometimes you overlap a lot other times you overlap a little but you’re always your own circle
On a whim, I returned home and decorated my childhood room. I added heaps of pillows, pots of plants. I dusted an old leafy rug to place beneath the cherrygloss side table. I added decorative books, vases, flowers. I’m not sure why I felt compelled to decorate a bed I no longer sleep on – … More Empty Nest
Happy Thanksgiving! This month, I practiced thankfulness by making a Gratitude Tree. Every day, I added a leaf that listed out what I was grateful for. As I generated leaves, I tacked them onto the empty branches – now that it’s Thanksgiving, I have my very own Gratitude Tree: Hope everyone is having a festive, … More Gratitude Tree
The interesting part, to me, is that when it comes to psychological mechanisms – like the subconscious or defensiveness or cyclical patterns of trauma – is how they occur under the surface, seemingly undetected, causing destruction later on. It’s like an eel slithering under a layer of frozen water. The eel slithers around – slither, … More Slithering Subconscious
The best dates are accidental – the bookstore/coffeeshop you didn’t expect, the historic square you didn’t anticipate, the flea market you didn’t know about. Today had all three – the bookstore/coffeeshop, the historic square, the flea market. I had an itch to go somewhere, maybe a bookstore or coffeeshop, preferably somewhere with space, parking, novelties, … More Accidental Date II
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
Lately, we’ve been on the same wavelength in slightly eerie, but mostly sweet, ways. Like how he’ll dream of a specific situation that I wake up in the morning drawn to. Or how we’ll both blurt out “thanks for cleaning the apartment” and “thank you for putting your stuff up” at the same time. Or … More Like Fish in Water
Le beau took me to the unpaved trail by the lake. When our bikes hit the loose gravel, I was reminded of the time we went off-roading in Colorado. On the trail, my legs burned. It was up, up, up, and then down. And then back up. We then turned back around, where I felt … More DĂ©jĂ Vu
We’re all the same type of people, loners who love and lone together, and there is no other relationship more fulfilling than knowing that you’re someone else’s person (not even in a romantic context) and they’re yours. … More Stream
This morning, bleary-eyed and still in bed, I found myself thinking about psychologist Dr. Ainsworth’s study on attachment styles in infants and how it affects relationships in adults. In the experiments, researchers studied how infants responded to their mothers’ departure and return. Some of the children were friendly when mom was present, sad when mom … More On Love, Attachment, and Rock
One psychology article that stuck with me revolved around happiness and memory. How our happiness, or lack thereof, goes hand-in-hand with the stories we craft. The stories of our lives, the stories of ourselves. These stories help us create meaning and to make sense of the world around us. … More Stories We Craft
Like a two year old, I’m starting to re-marvel at the mind, and how the people around us can only infer so much from the things we deliberately say. It’s like that quote from Murakami I always circle back to, whenever I feel tired or misunderstood or whatever: “I sometimes think that people’s hearts are like deep wells. Nobody knows what’s at the bottom. All you can do is imagine by what comes floating to the surface every once in a while.” … More The Morning
There are more sparklers, quiet starts, sputters and spins than full blown fireworks. The most exciting one is the giant sno-cone styled one that L chose. It shoots off for a solid minute, pauses, spits more sparks, stops, fountain of light. We don’t trust it when it stops going off. A runs over to pour beer into it. … More Fourth of July Weekend
I suppose in the end it’s a desperate struggle to make room for yourself in this world, by leaving behind stories, hoping they’ll suffice and be able to construct a near perfect image of our souls. A carbon dating for the experiences we’ll have buried. It’s terrifying, the yawning void. I used to be scared … More Daily Blog #474 : Of writing and telling people too much
In a half awake haze, I saw myself sitting at a train station. It looked like the train station on 34st. I was sitting on the train bench outside, waiting for the train to arrive. Waiting and waiting. So I waited and waited and waited and waited. At some point, though, I realized that the … More Train Station
Yesterday morning, we left the tiny house Airbnb. Leaving town, we cruised up Road 50. More beautiful winding roads up up the mountainside. There was a road delay up ahead, a sheriff told us: a thirty minute wait. We parked by the side of the road, across a ranch, where a hawk spun around in … More Jump Street and Symphony of Moo’s
As I laid there, pretending to sleep, I realized that the best decisions of my life were all impulsive. Done on a whim. A day before, I would never have imagined that I’d do what I did, but I did. Without any planning. Without any rational. And yet it’d shape up to be one of … More Whim
I’m like a small crying cherub filled with helium always on the verge of flying into the clouds and as if I’m on a string le beau will pull me down and remind me to be here with me now
coolpeppermint 